Above us Only Smog
Jan Hamminga
The subterranean traveller reports from the sky of the year award
video to go: Chemchasers
Neus Eddikt and the subterranean traveller were at the sky of the year award for best sky photograph after-party over at emptyplaneta.blogspot, giving their best to look the part. Neus wore a sky blue sweater with pre-chemtrail clouds print while the traveller sported a white track suit with planet Earth dangling from a copper chain and red leather boots. They had just missed the official ceremony and decided to simply mingle and check out the results from the candidates' mouth.
The five finalists all seemed glad to have made it to the showcase round without bothering too much about their ranking. Elephant in the sky, the winner with a beach scene and a ridiculous cloud overhead, told between them they covered five different aspects of 2014 weather which were equally in need to become known to the larger public. Hers clearly showed people's indifference to what was going on right over their heads, which was probably why she had won.
Neus nodded approvingly and eye-contacted the traveller. Big party it aint.
Let's give it a try.
Catalunya came talking, a picture of the square under a sunlight spectacle which was clearly visible behind numerous layers of cloud but of which nothing would reach the earth, leaving people out in the cold in early August. Some days it felt like November, Catalunya sobbed.
You're beautiful, Neus complimented and she smiled. Yes, she was, but she never managed to feel comfortable.
Next on their list was Milky Veil with struggling sun and a fresh chemtrail stabbing it straight through the heart in late afternoon. She was a classic picture, seen all too often over the course of the year. This one was taken in June near Castelldefels.
The subterranean traveller admired its dreamlike quality. Reminds me of a song, he said.
The sunlight is reflecting in strange ways with all the shit up in the air, Milky Veil declared.
It looks like a microwave operation, the subterranean admitted.
Now doesn't it, smiled Milky Veil. Things are burning up there, one gets the feeling.
That sounds bad news, claimed Neus Eddikt.
They moved over to a very sweet picture of cotton candy clouds grouped round the beaming sunlight. According to the jury's verdict they were a dogs orchestra, barking away high up in the sky.
Looks like an explosion to me, came Neus. This cloud burst open when all the metal particles, the stuff they're spraying, got charged.
Well, possibly, the traveller accepted in blackadder fashion, why don't we ask sweet Music herself.
She wasn't very talkative though, more of a nervous giggler trying to look pretty.
Poor girl, said Neus, her mind is shattered.
Just then were they met by the show's organiser, a tall guy like the traveller who called himself Djan. I liked your story about the spraying programme, he said, very revealing. I myself started taking pictures in January and I haven't stopped since. 2014 was definitely the year of the sky for me, so I thought it only fair to present the sky of the year 2014 award.
Neus was into this, replied the subterranean, she's very aware of the latest hidden secrets. I merely reported on it.
But Djan had turned away from them already and they now heard him explain the basics to some characters from earlier adventures, back when the whole sky thing hadn't been so grotesque yet:
Skies started getting odd late January and they have been quite embarrassing throughout the year. July had windy spells which blew some blue back and November saw almost natural circumstances for most days, but that was about it. Last weeks have been daily madness all over again.
Early skies were scary but beautiful, later they became more depressing, with the ever thickening smog over our heads making it almost impossible to enjoy the show. Patterns have changed as well. In the beginning it was all long lines widening out and creating the famed Milky Veil. After summer short fat lines started appearing. They quickly dissolved but they filled the sky with filth nonetheless, certainly nothing like ordinary planes produce. On coinciding days they would manage to block the sun out of a cloudfree sky.
The characters nodded silently, as if everything were totally bogus to them.
Those skies have earned their salt for growing into the new normal, Djan continued unfazed, but I thought since we are entering a new year, we now may expect to see it happen once more, a year in which a lot will be required of our strength and wisdom, why not show the other side of our crazy skies, which is their amazing beauty. As sinister as there silent existence may be, nobody able to conclusively explain their appearance, thanks to the electromagnetic pulses which push the damp into shape we see those exciting geometrical patterns. Aren't they gorgeous? I wanted to give you my favourites.
Neus and the subterranean traveller moved away for a blue curaçao with a haze of coconut milk. At the bar they met with Tourist Spec, the only sky tonight which was clearly altered.
Cool blue, complimented Neus.
Thank you, beamed Spec, who showed the sky above La Sagrada Família. It's not easy to get attention, see? When people surface from the metro they all look upwards, just to see how far construction has progressed since the last time round. Tourists, of course, don't leave it at that. In their well-practiced awe they stop in their stride and grab for their photo camera, with busy locals angrily urging them on. It's a classic display of mutual dislike. But is any one of these people looking beyond the spires to see what's going on further up? I thought it quite the spectacle and with a little added value deserving of a top spot.
She spoke hastily, as if she were on added value herself.
Message understood, dear, smiled Neus. Now why don't you apply some more of that added value?
I used to, countered Tourist Spec, but Djan thought for honesty a natural look might be better.
Yet you couldn't, finished the subterranean traveller. Not fully, at least.
Hell, no, shined Spec, what's the point of being clean when everything around you is adultered?
The traveller thought that a beautiful statement to end his report with.
